Maybe I just love who I am… for who I am.

I might not be as big as you but I’ve still got courage. I might not be able to stand up in front of a crowd and lie the way you do, but I’ve still got enough courage to stand up and tell them all the truth. I can keep myself from breaking down till they all hear the truth. I’m determined in what I do, even when you try out every possible way to shake me off of it. You can just pretend like you never saw this post, like you don’t bother about what I’ve got to say… but the truth is that I know you’ve seen what I’ve got to say to you. Why should it be a problem to you that I’m physically feeble, why do you even bother? Does it make you laugh, make you feel bigger? The next time, how about you compare yourself with someone more your kind? The sooner you stop with these silly tell-tales of yours, the sooner you’ll stop hearing from others that you’re wrong. It’s a cycle: you try to prove them wrong by telling them I’m not worth it, they try to prove you wrong by trying to explain why your argument is invalid. It hurts to know that you find me funny but if it was not for you I would have never known that there are people who care about me as well.  People who care. People who really do care. When you tell the people around you that I was always a loser I’m sure you never thought about my reaction to it, you never thought I’d even know about it. I haven’t been watching you but I’ve seen you. I haven’t been eavesdropping but I’ve heard it… I haven’t meant to intrude you, but I’ve accidentally walked past you when you were in the middle of another story about me. You know what? You’ve taken me by surprise. I’m not as angry as you might expect me to be about you. In fact, I might even be a little happy, a little sad too. I’m sad that you’ve been wasting minutes, hours, seconds and telephone calls speaking about me… I’m happy that I’ve still been part of your life. Maybe you’d learn to be stronger from what makes me weak, maybe you’d learn to be more confident by watching how much of a fool I make of myself when I try to be confident… maybe even you have learnt of emotions by pitying me, or by loving the mistakes that I make. Anyway you might want to have it, my weaknesses are part of me. Without those flaws, I’ll never be the girl sitting behind a screen typing these words. I just love who I am… for who I am. And this time, for those who argued for me, your argument is valid. For those of you who I heard saying I need to get a life, your argument is invalid. For you, be your argument valid or invalid, thank you, and believe me, I’m not as mad or stupid as I sound.


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. khaula naxir
    Dec 17, 2012 @ 15:49:52

    Love it. ❤


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