Happy 0th Birthday (From the OR)

Today I witnessed the birth of a beautiful baby girl and a beautiful baby boy. They kept their eyes shut and their fists clenched as their lungs breathed for the first time and let our the innocent cries of newborn twins. Congratulations to the parents, and Happy Birthday to the siblings!

I don’t know your name, and I don’t think I ever will.. but when your held your clenched fist up in the air I knew you’d be a fighter- fighting for your sister all the way through. And she’s trying to look at you, her eyes shut for you’re a light too bright in her eyes. Dull yourself for her, won’t you? And she’ll shine for you both. I don’t know her name either, but I bet she’s a lot like her mother- a quiet whisper, a silent laugh, a comforting silence away from slowing a world that’s moving too fast for you both. She’s slowing time, one glance at a time.. and she doesn’t mind that she has pushed her pain tolerance beyond the capacity of a meter, because she sees how you’re throwing your arms towards her already. She notices how when you cry, you’re only crying because you know no one will ever love you as much as she does. I don’t know your name, and you’ll never know mine… or how to pronounce it or what it rhymes with. You wouldn’t even know me, but I think I can live  with that. I’ll imagine your little fingers to grow into hands of talented artists, writers, musicians; your unopened eyes to open into a world of possibilities; your heart to love and your mind to embrace the beauty of life. I’ll never know your names, or your secrets or the stories of you growing up. All I know is this moment, this instant, this very second when you stepped into this world, and let me tell you- it was beautiful.

Wishing you both the very best in life- a smooth and calm ride, plenty of worthwhile memories and I hope someday we meet again (even if you don’t recognize me and I don’t recognize you).
Happy Birthday 🙂

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Today (It could have been)

Today could have been my day, but it isn’t.
It could have been the day where I stand in front of a camera, but I’m standing in front of my alarm clock instead battling sleep on one hand, and Internal Medicine on the other hand (and trust me, two hands aren’t enough).
Today could have been the end of a journey, but I’m still travelling.. way too far, for way too long.
Today, I could have won. But I chose not to.
Today I could have known so much about myself, but I remain confused.
Today I could have congratulated myself, but I’ve got no time for formalities.
Today I see the impact of the decision I made five years ago, instead of never knowing.
But today I’ve won anyway, even though I feel like I’m lost in terminology I’d never have known otherwise.
And today I choose again- the same road, the same walk, the same place… I chose when I didn’t choose you.